Letters from Ana

letter one
A long time ago...you started to think,about how great it would be if you were skinny like all the others.You could be anything you want...A model,who walks gracefully the runway.An actress who is still sexy... after all those years.
Or another actress who looks envogue no matter what she wears...Or maybe the empress of fashion...with connections, amazing clothes...and amazing hair.Or just a girl,beautiful girl with a smile on her face.
A girl who has many friends...and love.Even a child...You could be like a monument...stronger and tougher than anyone.You could be an angel...innoncent and fairy.
Mysterious...Transparent and fragile.A mythical creature...sometimes a little bit provocative.Sometimes sad,Once in a while just happy,but always...a symbol of perfection.Pure and absolute.
You could be anything...but you're not.
You aren't pretty,you aren't strong, you aren't brave
You have no friends,you have no love,you have nothing
ONLY FAT.
You are nobody
Lost in the middle of a sick world. Empty inside... Lonely... because you fell down... when you were thinking you're flying.
So lonely.
These secrets are walls that keep us alone...in the darkness.
I see no bravery in your eyes anymore,only sadness.
There is no way out...no hope.
You will never be...happy.
You will never be beautiful...as they are.
You will never be thin...enough.
You will never be perfect...
You will never be free...
Because I will always be with you...
Ana.

Letter two.
I'm not in the basement,I'm not under the bed,I'm not in the cupboard,I exist in you head. I will make you...run...cleanse...disappear.
I love you.
Let me guide you...should someone say you are a...skinny bitch...they are a liar...for you are a...fat bitch. ...You are pathetic.But I am your friend. ...Everyone else would let you down... All I ever wanted...was to make you happy.
"My love don't cost a thing". ...All I ask for...is some dedication...and a little loyalty.I could make you fly.I could make you whole.You are so...Goddamn lucky...that i found you.
"But I know what it's like to want to die,how it hurts to smile,how you try to fit in but you can't,and how you hurt yourself on the outside,to try to kill the thing on the inside..."